Why?
Because I am going crazy. Yes, crazy as in Britney Spears shaved head kinda crazy.... well... maybe not that extreme. Plus... I like my hair.
October is around the corner and I feel the pressure of trying to decide what I want to do. I'm so used to knowing exactly where I'm going. This is the first time in my life where I've never known where I am going to be next year.
And it seems like I can't make a decision about ANYTHING.
First, I thought I had decided that I am going to put off taking the GRE because I don't think I am going to grad school but for taking that option away from myself scares me.
A life without classes? No homework? Whaaaaat??? I just can't fathom it.
School is what I'm good at. It's what I've done for 17 years of my life. Now, I know you guys are thinking I'm some weird loser but oh well. I wear my nerd proudly.
At this point I don't even know where I even want to live. Do I want to stay here, even though I don't really like this city? Do I want to move back to St. Louis? At first St. Louis wasn't an option but the more and more I think about it, it keeps popping up.
The plan was to move up North but what in the world kinda jobs can a writing graduate find in Northern Indiana?
I realize, yes, it's only October but when you don't have the slightest clue what you're going to do, October quickly becomes January and January quickly becomes May. I would feel better if I had even the slightest clue what I'm going to do in the next 9 months.
I feel like if I don't start deciding I'm gonna lose time and I'll be the writing graduate still working at a dead end job I have no real interest in. I don't want to waste time not knowing what I want to do. I'd rather not have my life be a mystery to even me.
Can ya see why this is an internal struggle?
So I pose this question to you fellow transitioners and college grads, how did you beat the post grad (whether college or high school) panic?
I will be back tomorrow with a fun post, don't worry!
Forgive me for writing a novel here lol. I was in your shoes this time exactly a year ago. For me, grad school didn't require the GRE so I got lucky. Definitely TAKE IT! It's $175 and takes 4.5 hours (I work at a testing center) but well worth it because if you change your mind and decide that you really do want to go to grad school, you won't have to back-track and waste a semester or year just on that dumb test.
ReplyDeleteSo I applied to grad school, and waited. And waited. AND WAITED MORE. I applied to 7 schools total, and didn't get into ANY of them, and by this time it was June and I had already graduated and was making plans for school in the fall. I had no idea what to do. I was going to move back home when my temp summer job ended, but I realized that I love my college town too much and I didn't want to be 4 hours away from my boyfriend. I'm living with my 2nd mom, and I was able to find two jobs. One I am in love with and the other pays the bills. How did I find these jobs? I looked on the university's employment website, and did a ton of networking through my former employers and favorite professors. However, being in this college town kind of sucks because I don't get to go to football games, or see my friends/boyfriend, and the grocery stores and Target are always sold out of the things I need, plus traffic between classes is nuts. It's weird.
Thankfully, I can reapply this next year and try again but I'll have to retake some classes. So for me, I'm just flying by the seat of my pants until what I want works out.
Hope this helps! If you want to talk more or have other questions, feel free to email me! :)
nowen0513@gmail.com
beautyandbrainswithbrowneyes.blogspot.com
That's really good advice. Thanks so much!
Deleteah i know exactly how you feel..i've been there! but just keep your options open and know the right thing will work out how it should! change is good! xo
ReplyDeleteI'm waaaay past college graduation but I do understand what a huge decision you are faced with. Life transitions happen time and time again. The most important thing to remember is that if you do something and don't like it you can take steps to change it. If you move to St. Louis and it doesn't work out then try something else.
ReplyDelete